The obvious routine of many years back will soon come to a close; the sole accompaniment of TV news or some music from the computer will be changed soon. Breakfast will become an event, not an afterthought; dinner will be as eventful (and lunch, will still be lunch). Of all the things I have either conciously or subconciously wanted, the main theme would be a change for the better. That is what drives me ahead. Whether I make the wrong choice or the right one, it is still better for me to push ahead, rather than go blank and wither in the same spot all over again.
I don't think I'm a risk taker, but I admit I do take calculated risks; don't throw away the boat for something that's still remotely possible, I say. Gambling is frowned upon anyway in my religion, especially gambling with your life. Risk taking, however, is a part of life and part of how you learn things (especially if you fall flat on your face). And, as they say, anything that happens, has a hidden lesson in it. You just have to look for it.
As with many major decisions in my life, there has always been guidance from above to form opinion and reinforce my confidence in the decision, after considering all factors. Nothing's going to be perfect, but it's going to be great!
So as a step in a new direction, I am now officially engaged with Saskia :). We will post details about the marriage date as soon as possible.
Wish us luck :)